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My Quest for Monogamy That Is Slowly Opening My Mind to the Idea of Polyamory

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Disclaimer to anybody reading this that I may fuck, or will be fucking... LOL

No, seriously this is not set in stone, yet! Will my desires change? Possible. But at this very moment, I am all for a monogamous relationship and commitment!

But at the same time, there are moments when I feel like the polyamory choice of lifestyle may be a better fit for me.

I have been in this dating shit for almost 15 years now. I started dating guys when I was 15 and they were often much older than me (not over 30). So I have experienced a lot, dealt with a lot and learned a lot. Me personally, I think being in a monogamous relationship is beautiful. I admire love and those who find themselves committed to just one person.

On the flip side to that, I also get bored with most of the men I date or meet. Idk what it is, I catch feelings just as fast as I lose them. So in my mind (especially at the time of coming up with this blog article idea a few months ago) being with multiple men could intrigue me.

I'm not speaking from a sexual aspect. My idea of entertaining a potential polyamorous relationship isn't based on the sexcapades and threesomes. Sex is far from my thought process anyway at this moment.

For me, it’s the idea of having two (or possibly more) partners that I can have a commitment to and also a connection deeper than most monogamous couples.

That's the only way I would even entertain the idea of being in a polyamorous relationship. All of us involved would have to have ten times more of a deeper, stronger, solid connection than most monogamous couples. I need to have every aspect of a connection with those individuals. I need it to be emotional, physical and mental and nothing less than what I know I want or what I would require of them.

Let's be fucking honest! 

A gay monogamous relationship is often complicated in all aspects of the relationship. So I know being in a polyamorous relationship will be 100 times more complicated.

But that's when my requirements would come into play.

I'm not open to just being in a polyamorous relationship with just any and everybody.

I feel like their maturity level must be maxed out of this world! Their mentality both emotional and logical must be extreme! A physical connection has to be solid not just for me but for them as well.

I know many of you are probably thinking (well what about a commitment and potential cheating?) if I was to ever enter a polyamorous relationship the individuals I would choose would be beyond close to me. I would have to know them inside and out. It would be years of connection and friendship and then the polyamorous commitment would come into play.

The downside and the only factor behind me not rushing into or approaching the idea of having a polyamorous relationship is fear.

Fearing that something I create can be destroyed or ruined. I wouldn't be the only person involved. They would have to get to know each other and see if there's a connection as well.

I know some of you think it's not about them but for me it is. I want any and every relationship I enter into or join to be solid that nothing can break or ruin our bond.

It's deeper than just finding a couple of guys and claiming them. We have to be aligned spiritually and emotionally. That's why most black gay polyamorous relationships do not work or last. The ego must be checked and left at the door.

Nobody is a special bae or have more sexual perks than each other. We all would have to be equally yoked and that's complicated. It's hard to find that in a monogamous relationship, which is why I could never officially jump into or on the idea of a polyamorous relationship right away until I’m at least able to successfully achieve a monogamous relationship and maybe open the door to polyamory choices. But finding an open-minded partner would be the draining task.

What you guys think of having a polyamorous relationship and would you entertain the idea of ever being in one?

it’s a vibe it’s a mood 😛😜


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