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Sex Addiction in the Community With TheeSupaMan Co-Host on HereForIt Podcast

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How important is this subject for you and what are some of your thoughts on Sex Addiction within the gay community specifically the black gay community? 

This subject is highly important to us. The gravity of sexual addiction in the black gay community looms ever-present. We attribute it to just casual “ho activity” when really its more about compulsion and imbalance. Do everything in moderation children!


Why do you think sex addiction is an epidemic in the black gay community or gay community period? 

This topic is multi-faceted to say the least. We think it generally stems from the shrouds of conservative religion and the shackling of freedom of self-expression in the black household that typically leads to an explosion once you’re freed from the grips of those institutions. Tell a teenager what not to do and watch them sneak and do it and like it even more. Then continue to tell that teenager they are going to hell for said offenses and they should be more of a “man” or “woman” and watch the results dive into an addiction. Causality.


Have you experienced or gone through a promiscuous stage in your life as you explored your sexuality? 

Of course! We think most of us have. However our definition of promiscuity may be different than others as it varies per person. Some may feel like 10 sexualpartners in a year is A LOT. Others may think 10 in a month is manageable. Moderation children!


Do you think sexual promiscuity is acceptable for the youth in the gay community? 

Yes, definitely when done in moderation. How else should you learn besides hands on, on the job training?! As Ms. Frizzle famously said, “Take chances, make mistakes, get messy”!


Why do you think specific locations are known for higher rates of STDs and HIV more than other areas in America? 

Anywhere there is higher concentrations of people crammed into one place is a prime opportunity for higher STD and HIV rates to skyrocket. That’s just sheer numbers. Of course there are rates of infection in New York City versus Blacksburg, Virginia. We also tend to be a little more liberal in metropolitan areas.


It's a well-known fact that a lot of southern states deal with this crisis of dealing with a higher rate of black people period of STDs and HIV. Have you witnessed close friends deal with this crisis within your circle of friends and acquaintances? 

Yes both of us have witnessed friends cope and succumb to the ills of STD’s/STI’s and HIV. Ronald being from Memphis and Supaman having lived in Texas most of his adult life. Both have watched the miseducation of black gay youth lead them down the wrong path. A new day has dawn however with the rise and popularity of HereForIt Podcast, where the black gay youth can be both entertained and educated in vast swaths of perspectives.


What can we do to decrease the promiscuity and the sex addictionswithin our community from your own perspective?

We can decrease the stigma around promiscuity first and connect those with a true sex addiction to care second. Identifying whether you are truly addicted to sexis a major step however. Sex addiction has been normalized and glamorized at the same time. If you are dependent on sex so much that it effects or disrupts your normal life routine then you should definitely be seeking counseling assistance. Recognize what your normal routine was before you questioned “Am I having too much sex” and if said routine was altered to fit in one more partner or more experience, then you may have gone a bit too far. Again, moderation children!


I like to point often out the fact that I believe a lot of these sex addictionscome from traumatic experiences and also undiagnosed and untreated mental health issues. Would you agree with me or do you think its just the indulgement of choice? 

Definitely agreed that other mental health issues can compound and create conduits for people to act out their frustrations, regrets, fears, depressive and manic episodes. An indulgement of choice is us going to get butter pecan ice cream and watching too many RomCom’s.


Who do we blame the addict or the people who engage with them? I would say sex addiction has clear signs, and sometimes I think people use it to their advantage. 

Primarily the addict is to blame unless others are enabling them knowingly. Most people are unassuming and may not even know they are dealing with a sexaddict. If a top came to visit you for a round, but just came from a sleazy foursome prior to walking into your door, would you know it? Barring the nasty ones who wouldn’t shower between sessions there’s probably no way you’d know.


With everything just going at a rapid pace, what does this mean for the community shortly or next 20 years? Do you see it getting better or worse? 

We’re optimistic with the rise in popularity of PreP and clinical trials for HIV cures. We recognize the gravity of other STI’s/STD’s but none has had the generational impact and scourge that HIV/AIDS has brought to our community. Outside of the current Trump administration, HIV remains our gravest existential threat and every step we take to eradicating it is a leap in the right direction.


Do you believe sex addition could be a controlled issue if people were able to identify that they have a true problem? 

Absolutely, as we previously mentioned, identifying it and determining if it has adversely impacted your life balance is paramount.


How would you go about telling people the signs of discovering that they may have a sexual addiction or how they can see it in partners or random men they meet? 

Recognize what your normal routine was before you questioned “Am I having too much sex” and if said routine was altered to fit in one more partner or more experience, then you may have gone a bit too far. Again, moderation children!



Why do you think in the medical field has a hard time controlling sex addictionand why it's not viewed as a potential danger to prevent this from occurring in the future? 

Well the practice of medicine is just that, a practice. Mental Health has finally come more into the forefront of conversation in the world. It was nowhere near  as popularly talked about 30 years ago. Sexual Addictioncan fall into the same flow as it gets more scrutiny and attention.


Lastly what advice would you have for those who may be reading this interview and might be dealing with a sexualaddiction or know somebody who is suffering with it? 

Make the choice to be better and to realize your true potential is in front of you and not behind you. Standing in the eye of the hurricane can be scary and lonely, but every storm passes. Be ready for the sunshine.

it’s a vibe it’s a mood 😛😜


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