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Stop Lying To Yourself! That Man Don’t Love You!




How many of us have stayed in relationships that we knew we should have ended moons ago?

I know for a fact I’ve held onto relationships that had already been over and I was lying to myself and hoping that things would change.

The problem is nothing changes and then we’re forced to be confronted with the reality which we still continue to deny.

One thing about reality is the fact that no matter how hard you lie to yourself — the proof will always be in front of your face.

Holding onto things that serve us no purpose only keeps us stuck in our own misery.

How many people you’ve known that stayed in bad relationships and everybody else knew what the tea was in their relationship? They keep making excuses, hiding the facts, pretending and acting as if everything is okay.

There’s no worse imprisonment than to be a hostage in your own mind about your own fucked up relationship. It can’t get any worse than that and a lot of us were there and we’ve played that role too many times.

Love will have you shattered and still picking up the pieces trying to put a broken glass heart back together.

You can lie to yourself but the truth will always hurt if you don’t accept the facts for what it is. It’s not going to hurt as bad if you face it. The more you run from the truth the more painful your journey will be.

I’ve seen people get STDs, walked in their home to witness strangers in their bed, received threats from random people over the person they claim they love. What do you get out of being with a person who doesn’t value you, let alone care about your well being?

In Case If You Missed It!  Ghosted.

How are you going to fight for somebody that won’t fight for you?

Stop lying to yourself and face the fact that this man is no longer the dream man you’ve once met. We fall in love expecting forever with people who were only meant to be in our life temporarily if at all.

You can’t force a man to love you if he doesn’t even love himself. A lot of us meet these damaged souls and we think we can heal them and love them. After it’s said and done we end up being the ones who need the most healing. He’s going to leave you more damaged than what he brought into the relationship.

The more you forgive a person who not trying to change makes you the fool. Not a fool who isn’t wise enough to do better — but a fool who can’t see the facts as they are laid out before you.

We have to take responsibility behind the actions which we accept, tolerate and embrace. You’re abusing yourself every time you go back to that tormented soul. You can’t allow people to break your spirit because they are already broken. Hurt people hurt people, but you don’t have to be the one to accept their hurt as your own.

I know we often get caught up on the good side of the man and the good things he’s done in the past. That’s just a faded memory. If he was a good man then he wouldn’t have changed or switched upon you.

In Case If You Missed It!  Dear Gay Sapiosexuals Come Forth

No man will love you and then bring you pain willingly unless there is a bigger and deeper issue which he needs healing or help for.

Love yourself by getting out of any dysfunctional relationship. Because the longer you stay the more damage you’re causing on yourself. The best way you can save yourself is by not staying. If he doesn’t love you then let him go. Don’t try to stick around or get him to love you. If the love is gone it’s gone for good.



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Dear Gay Sapiosexuals Come Forth





A sapiosexual is someone that is sexually and mentally turned on by smart people. Sapiosexuals are aroused by intelligence.

I am 100 percent sapiosexual. This means you can’t get to my dick or ass until you fuck my mind first! Mmmkay?

I need a deep mental connection and stimulation for me to be aroused sexually. I have never been one for one night stands or flings. Yes, I’ve engaged in those activities but I am not a sexual seeker for random encounters.

Talking a good dick game and sharing nudes just not going to work for the majority of us.

Will human nature occur and create arousal? Of course its only natural. But sexually I won’t be engaged or stimulated enough to have my volcano erupt! 

For many of us, we want to get to know a man inside and out. Yes, the flesh is weak and once again we can be sexually aroused but nothing keeps that stimulation or focus longer than a deep mental connection.

I find that terminology such as sapiosexual is not widely known just yet. I think more people are now coming to terms with all of these different terms regarding demisexual, pansexual, omnisexual, autosexual, androgynosexual, graysexual, asexual and the list goes on.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting a meaningful conversation and a mental connection with a person. I think the biggest challenge for most of these men is the fact they don’t want to put in the work.

When you tell a guy you’re sapiosexual and he’s unsure exactly what that means and researches it. He immediately ghosts or become more distant because he realizes you won’t be as easy to conquer as the next guy.

In Case If You Missed It!  Dear Gay Sapiosexuals Come Forth

He feels intimidated because now he has to put in more work than he’s ever put in before with any guy. That’s demanding a lot for a lot of these men who are used to quick access to sex, love, etc.

Me personally I believe being sapiosexual has helped me in many ways. I like to explore a man’s mind deep. Nothing turns me on more than a man who is well diverse in his conversation and how he expresses himself during different topics. I don’t find myself sex-focused anymore like I used to be.

A man’s mind is the focus for me. More than anything else his mind gotta be on point to win me over before his body does. There’s so much power in not being powerless when it comes to controlling your sexual cravings or needs. When you are in full control nothing can alter your mind.

You won’t feel the way you usually would feel which leads most of us to sleeping with random people. In most cases the wrong people and then we left wondering why the fuck we fucked them.

Sex ain’t shit without a mental connection, fellas. You will feel empty after engaging in sex with a person you don’t feel any connection to at all. While some people may not feel this way the majority of us regret half of the people we once fucked.

Also, know it’s never too late to become sapiosexual. If you are tired of random bodies to your body count then make that change.

Some of you should be tired of going in and out of people’s clinics. Build a mental connection before you focus on sexual chemistry.

In Case If You Missed It!  The Type Of Man That Could Have You Delete All Your Dating Apps And Hoe Numbers!



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Dear Gays | Microwavable Relationships | Lets Talk!




The question of the day for many of you reading this article is why (A strong why!) do you guys feel gay relationships are so complicated?

I’m curious to find out why so many of our gay brothers struggle at building or maintaining relationships.

(Don’t be shy — you can leave a comment about this as well.)

Every time I go on Facebook or IG these gay couples are switching up and swooping new partners every other week or month.

Nothing seems stable and most of these couples fail to connect to each other outside of smoking and sex.

These microwaveable relationships are toxic.

These microwavable relationships will be the downfall of our future.

These microwaveable relationships are sky-high trending in our community.

Everything is so fast pace from the talking phase to the meeting to fucking to jumping in love prematurely.

A lot of these gay men (some of you reading this as well!) jump from one dick to the next in a short period of time.

Some of y’all be jumping from dick to dick just to get the last dick taste off your tongue.

I’ve seen some gays with a new boyfriend every two weeks. Some of you don’t even wash your sheets as often as you find a new man. No shade but shade, Pooh!

We have to stop getting in relationships that we are not willing to nurture or grow into over time. The issue is when we have to remember not to be so quick to throw in the towel at the slightest issue or problem that we may often come across in the relationship.

In Case If You Missed It!  The Type Of Man That Could Have You Delete All Your Dating Apps And Hoe Numbers!

But the biggest factor for all these microwavable relationships is due to many gays searching for the love that they lack within themselves.

Bang bang!!! Yeah, I went all the way the fuck in. If it hit you hard just now, you know it’s the truth too.

You running from one man to the next in hopes of finding love but you don’t see that YOU ARE the main factor in all of your relationship mess.

Instead of building strong relationships a lot of you treat dating as if you’re at a speed dating event. The only issue is y’all already supposedly established the relationship with the person and now you onto the next guy just as fast.

The same issues going to keep surfacing in every relationship you jump into overnight because you not taking time to get to know these men nor yourself.

I have been there and I’ve done it and I can confess to not being able to honestly love myself first.

You want to love everybody but your own self cause you will have to face your own insecurities or issues.

You think you’ve found somebody to take on those challenges but you only end up meeting yourself in that other person.

You think they going to love you for you and love you through your pain. They don’t because just like you they don’t often know how to love themselves either.

So we have a lot of guys chasing love from everybody else but themselves first and foremost. Some of these men struggle with identity issues, abandonment, trauma and more from their childhood oftentimes relating to their sexuality.

In Case If You Missed It!  Dear Gays | Don’t Lose Hope In Looking For Love!

So how do you expect hurt people not to hurt you too?

How do you expect hurt people who don’t love themselves or know themselves enough to love and genuinely get to know you?

The truth is they not going to be willing to fight for you as you should fight for yourself.

Most guys who run from relationship to relationship do not take a moment to stop and realize they running from all of their own problems.

The only result you will get is a cycle of dysfunctional microwavable relationships back to back. Just a new dick to conquer only to end up back single with a wet ass and nothing to show for it.

In order for a relationship to work, you need to work on yourself before building the relationship.

Guys, we need to stop pointing our fingers at every guy we deal with but also notice that we also have to focus on our involvement as well.

That’s not the case for everybody but even staying with a guy who ain’t shit is just as toxic.

If you with a man and you can’t tell him about shit or the obvious baggage he’s carried into your current relationship then give it up now.

Why would you stay in a bad relationship? What happened in your past relationship(s) for you to tolerate the current negative one?

Microwavable relationships do not benefit either party involved. If anything you both end up losing more than gaining by the end of the quick romance. It doesn’t last because most of the time neither of you has anything to bring to the table or to offer outside of the bedroom.

In Case If You Missed It!  I’m Getting Mine Before You Get Yours!




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Dear Gays | No Heteronormativity Allowed!




Heteronormativity is the belief that heterosexuality, predicated on the gender binary, is the norm or default sexual orientation. It assumes that sexual and marital relations are most fitting between people of the opposite sex!

Listen, fellas, we are not straight people. Please do not subscribe to a position in a relationship based solely on heterosexual couples.

I like the balance. I believe tops, bottoms, versatile men can be submissive or dominant. You can be a masculine bottom with a feminine top. It doesn’t have to be the opposite all the time. A bottom should have just as much power in the relationship as the top.

Nobody has to take the lesser position to be satisfied in the relationship or to please their partner. As ridiculous as that meme of the top claiming his bottom will not pay rent. People actually subscribe to that bullshit.

The Heteronormative narrative is overexposed, overrated and dysfunctional to our community. I see very few couples surviving off of heteronormative views.

I am all the roles in all aspects of a gay relationship. I don’t believe in forcing myself into one lane when it comes to relationships. I don’t wanna be forced to be submissive or dominant. I don’t wanna have somebody play zaddy or bottom bitch. I want to have a balance.

I believe the best relationships come from balance. Heterosexual couples who last the longest usually last due to balance. This isn’t the 1950s anymore. Women are not playing stay at home wives and mothers. That model of relationship has been broken a long time ago.

There’s enough opportunity in a relationship for both of us to strive and whatever our partner lacks at we should be able to pick up the slack. It’s about teamwork. It’s not based on being any particular roles in the relationship.

In Case If You Missed It!  The Type Of Man That Could Have You Delete All Your Dating Apps And Hoe Numbers!

The reason why I feel like the whole Heteronormativity mentality in gay relationships fails is that I feel like as two men, our ego will become fragile and eventually clash.

I don’t care how much a man wants a dominant controlling man who runs everything. Eventually, he’ll want to take his power back. At some point in time, he’ll rebel or feel as though his voice isn’t being heard in a relationship.

I don’t care how much he wants to play wifey or that bottom submissive role. It’s only a certain amount of time before he’ll feel as if he’s not being respected or considered in the relationship.

Heteronormativity is toxic and only holding us back from forming our own understanding of what a gay relationship entitles. We have to create our own relationship model and build our own mind when it comes to dating and love as two men in a union together.

Our fairytale romance will never look like the straight romantic flicks in the movies and on television. No matter how close we come to it. It’s just different in many ways.

We need to discover how a real gay relationship supposed to look and then we’re able to succeed at building our own relationships outside of how straight couples engage in their own relationships.

Do not define your relationship by the heteronormative standards.



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