Selective Homophobia: The Act Of Picking And Choosing The Acceptable Gays! 1 3119

What annoys me is when Black straight-identifying men say,

“Oh, you a cool gay bul. I don’t F with a lot of gay people. You, not a F-bomb, you cool with me.”

[literally, something an old co-worker once told me.]


ish boils my blood. I can’t stand when people want to separate or divide gays as if the less flamboyant “girly” hyper-masculine gays are more acceptable to be around than the “pretty boys.”
Some men with homophobic tendencies will make small remarks about certain gays just to get a reaction out of people.
It’s okay to be around if you don’t threaten their manhood or make it questionable for them to be around you. So the less “flaming” you appear to be, the cooler they are around you. I don’t understand why straight-identifying men feel this way.
Let’s say you have a relative and they okay with you being gay. Now the problem comes into play when you can’t bring your “gay arse friends” around, or they don’t want them [other gays] in the mix.
You okay because you’re “family” or you’re “masculine” and you don’t act “like a sussy or a gay guy.”

I don’t care if we’re related through marriage or blood. You will give my fellow brothers the same respect you give me.


It’s not about who’s more masculine or feminine. Because the moment, I do something that pisses you off. You going to remind me I’m gay, I’m this, and I’m that.
You not going to be “gay-friendly” at that point.
You will call me all kinds of derogatory names.

If you don’t F with one gay or those gays [ovahhh there], then you mind as well not F with me.

The same way you talk about them, you going to talk the same ish about me behind my back. If you don’t already do [SMH]. People will show you their true colors quick. So don’t feel comfortable because you got a seat at the heterosexual table with the straight fellas. The moment you do something they ain’t feeling you the F-bomb, gay guy, sussy, you know ish they call all gays. 

If you’re homophobic, you’re just a homophobe.


There’s no such thing as you being cool with me because I’m not a “messy gay” or I don’t act like the gays on “The Jerry Springer Show” or the gays on TV. That ish is crazy to me. If you don’t respect them, then you don’t respect me. 
It’s facts! It’s not even about who’s more masculine than the other.
I believe there is a lot of selective homophobes out here around us.
Smiling in our faces.
Using us for ish they want to get out of us.
Pretending to be our “Sus.”
It’s no different from selective racists.
“I’m cool with you because you talk proper, act this way and don’t act ghetto.”
You know how some lovely Caucasian people act and what they give. “Oh Tommy, you speak so well for a Black man.” [SMH!]
I am not here for the BS. If I take dack up the arse and if they take dack up the arse too then we in the same boat. You can’t separate us even if you claim you cool with me. I can’t be comfortable around you because you’re ignorant as hell. I don’t even trust you! 

I’ve been around countless of selective arse  homophobic people.

All that “you cool in my book because of XYZ,” ain’t cutting it.
If you don’t respect other gay people, then you don’t respect me. 
I will not allow you to pin me against them [vice versa].
Most of the time, these messy arse people just want to escalate drama.
They weren’t slick with it trying to get me to throw shade so they can go back and pull the same stunt with them. Just to see “those gays over there” going at it.
I ain’t no fool and that’s why I swiftly dip on that arse the moment you show any signs of selective homophobia. You will not have me involved in your shenanigans.
If you know somebody that can’t respect other gay people, then don’t waste your time with them. It doesn’t matter if they are a relative or a childhood friend. If a person shows you their true colors don’t let them disrespect you either. If they don’t F with the gays over there, then they don’t want to F with you as well. They “tolerate” you, but for me, that’s not enough. It’s all or nothing! You either down with us all or you not.

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I write what I love and share what my little golden heart desires! 👨🏾‍💻 Black Gay Writer, Author, Creative Creator. Future Filmmaker, Television Producer and Mogul In The Making!

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